2015-08-25

Waktu terasa pantas berlalu. Sedar tak sedar dah hampir setahun dah sambung PhD. Well, biasalah. Bukan belajar lah namanya kalau takde naik turunnya. Setahun yang mendewasakan. Setahun yang penuh dengan onak ranjau yang berduri. Setahun yang penuh dengan suka duka.

Empat lima bulan yang pertama berjalan dengan sangat lancar. Semangat masih utuh. Namun, masuk bulan keenam, sedikit demi sedikit mula rasa ketinggalan. I am afraid that I cannot absorb what I have read the past few months. I started to skip going to lab. Like once every week, then twice every week and I don't even realize I have skipped going to lab for almost 5 months. Skip going to lab means I skip meeting my supervisor(s). Yes, it is to that extend.

During Eid Mubarak, my main supervisor came looking for me at my house. He came to talk to me in front of my parents. From there, I realize that it is still not too late for me to back to the right path of my journey. I brace up myself and going back to lab with a new fighting spirit. It's been a month since the visiting, and two weeks to go before my proposal defense. Seriously, I regretted the times I have wasted before. I should just face off all my problems instead of avoiding them. 

I will never repeat the same mistake twice. Even if the progress is not in line with what I have planned, I will work harder just to ensure I keep the right track until the end of my journey.

In sha Allah.

2015-01-08

Hello..

Is it a normal thing when you found yourself lost sometimes throughout your journey?

I search for one word, and as I keep on searching for the best references for that one word, I realize there's A LOT of things that I can't understand with just one reading. I need to read the sentences/paragraphs over and over again until I convinced myself that I've really understood what I read.

Ilmu; semakin kita mencari dan mengejar ilmu, semakin banyak yang kita tidak tahu.

If you know what I mean.

Terasa ceteknya ilmu yang dimiliki, takkan pernah setanding dengan ilmu ALLAH S.W.T.

My expectation of what will I do in my research is actually just quarter of what am I supposed to do in reality. Okay. Okay. Okay.

Time to reorganized everything. Time. Schedule. Money. Well, everything.

Stay calm.

Stay positive.

I can do it.

In sha Allah.

2014-12-30

Hello..

Lusa, kita akan bergerak ke tahun baru tahun 2015. Banyak benda dah berlaku sepanjang tahun 2014. Started to work as an electrical engineer at a consultant company on 2 May 2014, graduate as a Master Degree holder from UTM on the same month, resigned from the company on 31 July 2014, and enrolled as a PHD student at UNIMAS on 10 September 2014.

Status changed from a student to an engineer. Then, to an unemployed 25 y/o person and back to a student. All in just one year. Phew.

People around me gave a different reactions when they heard I'm going to pursue with my PHD.

1. Are you serious? Your life is all about study, huh?

2. That's great! You can be a lecturer after you completing your study.

3. Is this your own decision or is there someone forcing you to continue with your PHD?

And so on.

First of all, yes I am serious. I'm serious about my study. I'm not joking around and won't risk my youth just like that. Haha. It's not that my life is all about study. It's not about eagerly trying to achieve a Dr. title either. I just.., found something that I'm interested in. I just want to know more about it. I want to do something that is worth my time, money and energy. And the most important part is I want to contribute something to the country. 

For the time being, I don't have much interest to be a lecturer, for I'm not pursuing my study just to be a lecturer. It's all about knowledge. I want to be a good engineer. The best engineer in my future workplace. I have a dream since I was in my first year Bachelor Degree. I want to work at Sarawak Energy. I even have been invited to attend an interview as an engineer at a Thermal department. But, I have to forgo the interview since I'm already attached with my study. Well, kalau ada rezeki, takkan ke mana kan? :')

Nobody is forcing me to further my PHD. It's all my own decision with a great support from my parents. So, I hope I can do my very best in my study.

Hope / Expectation :

My duration of study is 3 years. As any other PHD students, I want to achieve GOT ( Graduate on Time ). So, I have to make sure to submit my full thesis report SOT ( Submit on Time ). Aaminn.

I will work harder to ensure my work progress to move along with my study plan in these 3 years. 

In sha Allah.